Depression is a common affliction among Americans. In 2023, 29 percent of all people surveyed said they were diagnosed with depression at some point in their lifetime. I am one of the 29 percent. I currently take three antidepressants (one is for sleep).
The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders-DSM-5 defines depression as “ a mood disorder that causes a persistent feeling of sadness and loss of interest.” The DSM-5 classifies it into the following categories: Disruptive mood dysregulation disorder, major depressive disorder, persistent depressive disorder (dysthymia), Premenstrual dysphoric disorder, and Depressive disorder due to another medical condition.
Diagnosis of depression requires the presence of at least five of these symptoms:
Depressed mood
Loss of interest/pleasure
Weight loss or gain
Insomnia or hypersomnia
Moving too slow or too fast
Fatigue
Feeling worthless
Decreased concentration
Thoughts of death/suicide
Genetics is a risk factor, and so is the environment. Stanford University estimates that around 50 percent of all cases of depression may be caused by genetics. The Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) test measures how many traumatic childhood experiences someone had. A 2024 study found a link between a higher ACE score and depression as an adult.
Depression vs. Grief: How To Tell the Difference
Depression and grief feel so similar that it’s hard to tell the difference. It’s particularly tough to tell the difference when you are a childhood trauma survivor in recovery. Grief for the childhood you lost is part of the recovery process. So, how do you tell the difference?
First, let’s look at the difference between grief for a lost loved one. Sadness and grief are normal when someone dies. It is a natural process but unique for each person. You may withdraw for a while while grieving. Although some will describe grief as depression, it’s not. Here are a few key differences:
Grief, and the sadness that it brings, comes in waves. With depression, sadness is constant.
A healthy self-esteem usually stays intact with grief but not with depression. Feeling worthless is common when someone is depressed.
A grieving person may long to join their loved one, while some depressed people actually want to die.
It’s possible to grieve and be depressed, which will make the grief more severe and longer lasting. It’s important to distinguish between the two. Two years ago, I lost several friends. I learned to differentiate between grief and depression so my treatment could be effective.
Treating Depression
If you have been depressed for any length of time, seek help. I tried for so long to go it alone, and I tried to power through intense and constant feelings of sadness. Don’t be like me, nor do what I did. I increased my suffering. Medication has helped me tremendously. My current score on the depression test is 9. Three years ago, it was 31. I no longer live with persistent sadness.
A score of nine is mild depression. I attribute that to trauma. I am doing Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) therapy, along with talk therapy. (Yes, I have two therapists.) I know that as I continue processing the trauma and its effects, that score will decrease. Trauma recovery is a marathon and not a sprint.
In addition to medication, I practice mindfulness. I constantly remind myself to be in the moment. As I type this article, I pay attention to the feel of the keyboard and the wind from the fan. I also journal mindfully. I write about what I feel and where those feelings occur in my body. I also write about triggers and any insights I gain about myself.
You are not alone, despite how isolated you feel. I have walked the same road. There is freedom from depression. I encourage you to take the online depression test. Then, find a psychiatrist or psychiatric clinic in your area. Check out the American Psychiatric Association’s directory. And if you are not in therapy, I encourage you to find a therapist at Psychology Today.
