How To Stop the Holiday Blues
Coping With Christmas
This article is the first part of a three-part series called Coping With Christmas.
I used to call myself a “bah humbugger.” While I looked forward to Thanksgiving, I dreaded the Christmas season. There are bad childhood memories associated with this season. I had a hard time even decorating. That started changing 10 years ago when I realized I had let the past define my present. I threw myself into Christmas decorating and focusing on the religious meaning behind the season. I stopped the holiday blues.
The holiday season is tough for many people. A survey by the American Psychological Association (APA) found that 72 percent of respondents agreed that the holidays can feel bittersweet. More than half (63 percent) said they would use negative words such as stressful, overwhelming, or exhausting to describe the holiday season. Two in five (41 percent) said their stress increases between November and January. For 43 percent of the respondents, the stress interferes with their ability to enjoy the holidays.
The reasons why included financial concerns (58 percent), finding the right gifts (40 percent), and missing family or loved ones (38 percent). People who celebrate non-Christian religious holidays reported feeling added stress during those months. One in five said they experience stress during this season. They also reported not feeling they are a part of the “holiday season” in the U.S.
The holiday season can be very tough for people with a mental illness. A National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) survey found that 24 percent of people diagnosed with a mental illness find the holidays make their condition a lot worse or somewhat worse. I know from experience that the holidays can worsen depression and anxiety.
I also know what it is like to be around people with bipolar disorder as a child. A grandparent on each side of my family had bipolar disorder. During the holiday season, they would experience manic episodes. Their mania contributed to my bad memories associated with this time of year. My childhood trauma, combined with my mental health struggles, caused me to become a true blue bah humbugger. However, I am not one now.
3 Ways To Avoid the Holiday Blues
I no longer struggle with the holiday blues and can now find joy in the season. It started 10 years ago, as I previously stated, but it took years to get where I am now. In 2018, I discovered deep breathing exercises right before the holidays, which helped me become aware of how much past trauma affected me. That awareness led me to find tools that helped me during the lockdown in 2020. That Christmas season was tough, but I could find joy in it because I used my recovery tools.
Here is a breakdown of how I conquered the holiday blues:
I recognized why I had a problem with the holidays and stopped making excuses for dreading the season. I wrote down why. I asked myself if it had to do with childhood trauma. I focused on my breath for five to 10 minutes a day. Doing so cultivated an awareness of the present moment, which helped me let go of the past.
I journal more during December. I grab my notebook and jot down my emotions, triggers, and inspirational quotes. It centers me. This year, I started writing down what I learned from the day. Doing so helps me this December focus on finding meaning in the Christmas holiday.
I admitted that I become depressed when there’s less sunlight. I recognized that I have seasonal affective disorder (SAD). I take vitamin D supplements, which help me during the winter when fog creates a thick, white blanket over California’s Central Valley. I have used an ultraviolet lightbulb in the past, and it helped tremendously.
Transforming how you think about the holidays takes time. As with trauma recovery, there’s no fast food healing, but putting in the work to change your thinking about this time of year will bring joy.
What do you do to avoid the holiday blues?
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