I decided to make Morning Musings a permanent feature. Today this column is all about good books that aid in trauma recovery. I am a serious reader, and I suspect you are too. We Substackers, both readers and writers, love the written word. Fortunately, there are so many resources that help with recovery.
I am limiting my recommendations for this week to books about trauma, sexual abuse, and spirituality. Next week I will cover books about tapping, meditation, and anxiety.
Trauma
What Happened to You: Conversations on Trauma, Resilience, and Healing by Oprah Winfrey and Bruce D. Perry
I read this book in June 2021. I couldn't put it down. I already knew how trauma affected the brain, but this book added to it. I realized after reading it that being a toddler when the sexual abuse started caused damage to my brain. As the book makes clear, that damage is reversible. If you are a childhood trauma survivor, this is a must-read book. It will help you further understand the effects of trauma.
Trigger warning: It can unearth buried emotions. It did that for me. It stirred up the sadness I stuffed down as a child. I practiced tapping, meditation, and deep breathing to release the sadness. About seven months after reading the book, I went back into therapy. Ten months after, I began taking an antidepressant. While it was very difficult to feel that intense sadness, it lead me to seek out more recovery tools.
“We elicit from the world what we project into the world, but what you project is based upon what happened to you as a child.”
The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma by Bessel van der Kolk
It was during the lockdown in the summer of 2020 that I read this book. It’s a one-stop-shop of information about trauma, its effects, and post-traumatic stress disorder. I understood more about how trauma affected me and how I developed my coping mechanisms. I highly recommend it to anyone who is a trauma survivor. Go slowly and take notes as you read.
“Traumatized people chronically feel unsafe inside their bodies: The past is alive in the form of gnawing interior discomfort. Their bodies are constantly bombarded by visceral warning signs, and, in an attempt to control these processes, they often become experts at ignoring their gut feelings and in numbing awareness of what is played out inside. They learn to hide from their selves.”
Sexual abuse
Secret Survivors: Uncovering Incest and Its Aftereffects in Women by E. Sue Blume
I first read Secret Survivors in the mid-1990s. I felt like the author knew me personally. It helped me understand how sexual abuse affected me emotionally and relationally. This book lacks information about the brain, but it is still helpful for sexual abuse survivors.
Trigger warning: Reading this book is not easy. It’s painful. It stirs up buried emotions. I recommend practicing tapping and deep breathing as a way of coping with whatever is unearthed.
“...Incest is rape by extortion. Thus the child's very childhood becomes a weapon used to control her.”
The Courage to Heal: A Guide for Women Survivors of Child Sexual Abuse by Ellen Bass and Laura Davis
I first read this book while living in New Orleans and attending the University of New Orleans. While chatting with a friend in his dorm room, he picked up the book from his desk and told me, “Read it.” I began reading it later that night, and by the next day, I started having flashbacks. This is the book that started me on my recovery journey. It is great for understanding the effects of abuse.
“You have already lived through the hardest part–the abuse itself. You have survived against formidable odds. The same abuse that undercut you has also provided you with many of the inner resources necessary for change.”
Spirituality
Immortal Diamond: The Search for Our True Self by Richard Rohr
We develop coping mechanisms to survive the trauma, and they lead us to embrace a false self. Rohr’s book is like a big light shining on the dark parts of our souls. I have read the book three times since 2020. I will read it over and over.
I recommend reading it slowly as a morning devotional book. Keep a notebook nearby. You will want to not down quotes. Rohr is a spiritual teacher with much wisdom.
“Once you have encountered this True Self–and once is more than enough–the False Self will begin to fall away on its own.”
Intimacy with God: An Introduction to Centering Prayer by Thomas Keating
I practice a type of contemplative prayer or meditation called centering prayer. The late Catholic monk, Thomas Keating, wrote a book with many meaningful quotes for trauma survivors. Whether you are Christian or not, you can benefit from reading it. This is another one where you will need a notebook and pen nearby.
“The body is the storehouse of the emotional pain of early life as well as the consequences of trying to deal with that pain through coping mechanisms such as repression and compensatory activity.”
Activity
What books do you recommend to help us on our recovery journey? Leave a comment below with your recommendations.
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Image by alohamalakhov from Pixabay
Notes on the image
No, I didn’t take this picture but it looks like the vineyards that surround me in rural Fresno County, where we make raisins and table grapes. I grew up around vineyards and they are my preferred landscape.